


Young Justice - Mind Rape Is Not Romantic

by blackash26



Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Archived From Tumblr, Discussion of Mind Rape, Essay, F/M, Nonfiction, discussion of domestic violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-07 12:27:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16853950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackash26/pseuds/blackash26
Summary: This essay was posted on Tumblr in JUNE 14, 2012. It analyzed M'gann's behavior toward Conner in at the beginning of season 2 of Young Justice.





	Young Justice - Mind Rape Is Not Romantic

I normally avoid fandom ranting because I think it’s pointless, but after the last episode I think there’s an issue that really needs to be discussed.

In the midst of everything that happened with Kaldur, Artemis and Wally it’s pretty easy to completely skip over the revelation of why Conner broke up with M’gann. Those who noticed the reason didn’t always seem to grasp just how problematic M’gann’s actions toward Conner were.

I’m going to put this out there straight and simple: M’gann’s behavior was abusive and wrong.

I can accept M’gann’s reasoning for lobotomizing aliens. She and Superboy clearly have different values when it comes to what they think is acceptable in the field.  _That’s_  okay. Couples don’t have to agree about everything.

M’gann’s behavior becomes abusive when instead of responding to Conner’s concerns with calm, collected discussion, she tried to mind rape him into forgetting his concerns.

Let me repeat that. She tried to  ** _mind rape_**  her boyfriend.

That isn’t sweet. It isn’t romantic.

Her actions were entirely selfish. That was her being unable to deal with her partner having a different viewpoint and responding by erasing the problem. She had no problem trying to fundamentally change her boyfriend’s mind, to make him go against his deeply personal beliefs, and was only sorry because he caught her. Her actions were a complete and utter violation of his trust in her.

If you’re thinking that this isn’t abusive behavior, let me reframe the situation a bit. Let’s say Conner was the one who was misusing his powers. Maybe he was being too violent with the enemy, causing permanent damage in battle. Maybe he broke a villain’s back or suffocated a bad guy long enough that the guy retained permanent brain damage. Now, let’s say M’gann felt uncomfortable with this behavior, even though Conner was saving a lot of innocent lives by taking down the villain much faster than he used to.

If Conner responded to this by telling her that she was being a silly woman who didn’t know what she was talking about, that would probably be problematic, right? If he responded by intimidating her until she agreed with him, you’d probably be up in arms, right? If she tried to leave and he physically overpowered her in order to restrain her and  _make_  her stay, that would be abusive, right? If he decided to help her realize her continuing love for him by  ** _raping_  **her, I sure as hell hope you wouldn’t decide that was somehow romantic.

I know that it’s incredibly difficult for people to comprehend the idea that a woman can be the abusive partner in a relationship gone wrong. Many feminists will outright deny that there are male victims of domestic violence even though two in every five victims of domestic abuse are male.

But the fact of the matter is, if you believe that men and women are equal, you have to also believe that women are just as capable of violence and manipulative behavior as men. Denying this does a disservice to both men and women and endangers male victims of abuse.

I’m honestly impressed that Young Justice has gone in this direction. It’s so rare for a show to acknowledge that women can be the abusers in a relationship, too, without turning it into a big [joke](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Ftvtropes.org%2Fpmwiki%2Fpmwiki.php%2FMain%2FDoubleStandardAbuseFemaleOnMale%3Ffrom%3DMain.AbuseIsOkayWhenItIsFemaleOnMale&t=OGVmYmJlYzgwNDk1NDU0MTY3MjIzZTYzZDc1ZDA4MzBhYjFjMDk3NSx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0).

(After all, nothing is funnier than watching a man being beaten to death by his wife. Oh, and a man whose self-esteem has been  so thoroughly shattered that he can’t act on his own is pretty hilarious, right?)

Young Justice even went beyond the simple implication of abusive behavior and portrayed the fallout in a surprisingly realistic way. When I was watching the episode, I felt so proud of Conner for breaking up with M’gann, especially since he clearly still has feelings for her. That’s very realistic. Up until her betrayal she was the most important person in his world. He can’t help loving someone who has hurt him, but he does his best to get away from her even though the decision was obviously painful for him.

Conner showed an impressive amount of strength in how he dealt with the situation with M’gann, especially considering the fact that no one knows why he broke up with her. He clearly kept her actions a secret because, even though he left her, he’s still trying to protect her from getting in trouble. So Conner basically has no support system and hasn’t since he left M’gann.

And what does M’gann do in response to Conner leaving? She doesn’t realize that she was in the wrong; she barely acknowledges that Conner had a legitimate reason for leaving. Instead she immediately gets a new boyfriend, probably in an attempt to make Conner jealous. To me it appears that she is obviously trying to manipulate Conner into crawling back to her.

In “Depths” when Conner and M’gann actually talk about why they broke up, M’gann is  _incredibly_  dismissive. She says she’s “sorry”, but it’s pretty clear she’s just sorry Conner is bothered by it. She doesn’t see a problem with her behavior; she just wants him to get over that itty-bitty attempted  ** _mind rape_** , that’s all.

But, hey, obviously Conner should forgive M'gann and understand why she did what she did. She was probably just stressed after all. She didn’t mean to betray his trust. She just loves him, is all. She wants what’s best for them, and Conner just can’t quite understand that yet. But he will, and then Supermartian will get right back together and all will be right with the world.

If you were smiling and nodding as you read that last paragraph, you might want to step back and reexamine your ideas of what love is. Because that sort of thinking is what keeps people trapped in abusive relationships for years, for their entire  _lives_.

If you think I’m overanalyzing a children’s cartoon, I suppose you could say I was also overanalyzing the obvious parallels made between clone!Roy’s search for Speedy and Roy’s drug abuse in the comics. I was also clearly seeing things when I noticed the barley veiled references to domestic abuse in the Longshadow household.

Oh, you saw those too?

Huh.

Maybe I’m not overanalyzing things after all. I guess it was just easy to miss this considering everything else that was going on during that episode.

I will personally be deeply disappointed if M’gann and Conner get back together. Not because I dislike M’gann. I think she’s pretty awesome. But I think putting them back together sends the worst kind of message since it would basically be condoning female on male abuse unless M’gann seriously realized the error of her ways and actually changed for the better permanently. Which, given her behavior in “Depths”, seems highly unlikely.

I don’t care who Conner ends up with or if he ends up with no one at all. But I’d really like to see him engaged in a healthy relationship with someone who respects his thoughts, opinions, and beliefs.

**If you or someone you know is being abused by a partner, physically, emotionally or sexually, please seek help. There are a lot of organizations and people out there that can help you if you just seek them out. No man or woman deserves to be abused.**

[A Hidden Crime: Domestic Violence Against Men Is a Growing Problem](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dailyfinance.com%2F2010%2F01%2F30%2Fa-hidden-crime-domestic-violence-against-men-is-a-growing-probl%2F&t=NmU4MDgxZjA4NDMxNTA2ZGRkNTE4NTU2MmFmY2EyN2FiOWY3ZmI1Myx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0)

[Domestic violence against men: Know the signs](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mayoclinic.com%2Fhealth%2Fdomestic-violence-against-men%2FMY00557&t=MWRmMzc3YzI0MjZhZGMxNjVkOTkzODg0MjQ1ZTFiNzViOGUzZWZlMyx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0)

[Domestic Violence: The Male Perspective](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.parity-uk.org%2FRSMDVConfPresentation-version3A.pdf&t=YjJkMWZhMjI0NWI5Nzk5YWI2MzQ5NzQzOWFiOTFmOTRjNGE5M2U3Nyx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0)

[More than 40% of domestic violence victims are male, report reveals](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.guardian.co.uk%2Fsociety%2F2010%2Fsep%2F05%2Fmen-victims-domestic-violence&t=ZmE0NjVmODk4Y2E1MGM1ZTMyMjlmNWI0YWU0YTU0ZmUxZWVmNTE5OCx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0)

[The invisible domestic violence – against men](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.guardian.co.uk%2Fcommentisfree%2F2011%2Fjun%2F07%2Ffeminism-domestic-violence-men&t=OTliZmFiNDAzZmFlNDdhMGY4ZDY0NGVlZTg4N2UzZDk4MTc3OWFmZCx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0)

[Men as Victims of Domestic Violence](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.adfvc.unsw.edu.au%2FPDF%2520files%2FMen_as_Victims.pdf&t=NDc3ODYwYWUyZDEyNzJmODQ2NjhiOTM0YWYzMzQzY2IyYTE1MTllZCx3RTJyWmZlTQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ALKQSNzkUuDtZhA906DPrVA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fstoriesintheashes.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F25124158175%2Fyoung-justice-mind-rape-is-not-romantic&m=0)


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